Cake is never the answer.

Today I am 111 days sober. Crazy, right? I mean, I never would have thought I would quit drinking, then alone be sober for 111 days! It is something I am proud of when I really think about it. Honestly, I am not the type to be proud of myself…so this is a break through!

I joined Kate Bee’s “Sober School” on July 6th (111 days ago!) and that helped me “kick the drink”. I highly recommend it if you are still struggling with the wine witch, as we ladies some fondly refer to her. It’s such an amazing group of women who helped me realize I was not alone in my insanely bad habit/addiction. I would not be doing this blog if I had not found the Sober School. I would be too drunk to care. But, more about that later.

Quitting drinking was one of the hardest things I have done. 111 days is not a super long time, but there was a time when 1 day seemed impossible. One thing I know about myself is this, I won’t go back. I know that sounds “boastful” or “presumptuous” or “arrogant”. But, truthfully, I can’t. I can’t drink again. I know enough about myself to know, if I do, I will never stop. So, this is it. This is my chance. My chance to change my life. And I’m going for it.

I have only been a heavy drinker for about 17 years. That sounds like a very long time…and yes, it is, but I have been overweight for longer. My obesity has been with me for at least 35 of my 49 years. So, when I think about it, I can honestly say that being a drunkard was the lesser of the two addictions in my life. Obviously food was with me first.

I am going to assume that anyone reading this is 1) currently or previously a drunkard like me, and 2) currently struggling with obesity. Otherwise, I can’t imagine why you would want to read anything about me. But, then again, I can be very entertaining. Even my ex husbands girlfriend thought I was funny the first time we met. Who knew?

If you read my ABOUT page, you already know that I am using this blog to help me get healthy. I quit drinking and now I need to lose weight and get my body functioning so I can live a long, healthy, happy life. I have a 9 year old son. He is my life and my inspiration. He is my WHY. I am hoping blogging will inspire me. I need to learn why my addictive personality has lead me to drinking and eating. I feel like I should be able to apply some of the techniques I learned when I got sober to losing weight.

When quitting alcohol people often turn to sugar. Scientifically, it’s because there is so much sugar in alcoholic drinks, many of us have cravings for sugar. We are avoiding the wine, so we go for the cake, ice cream, chocolate, cookies, pies, pastries – you get the picture. In fact, even the ladies in Kate’s group talk about how its ok to eat the sugar because we are still adjusting to the new “sober” life. Many say not to worry for at least a year before trying to quit eating the sugar. Getting sober is a tough job, there’s no reason to make it harder by trying to stop eating sugar. But, for me, weight issues and physical struggles mean I can’t eat sweets for a year or it will just get worse. I need to figure this out now.

I guess, starting this blog, I am hoping to force myself to focus on my sobriety and my overall health. By sharing my personal struggles with others I am committing to continuing to move forward. If I share my goals with strangers who maybe have the same issues, it will force me to make the changes I want to make. Maybe, just maybe, I will not only stay sober, but will find my healthy lifestyle too.

Thank you for being here. ~Ms. K

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